It's a Marathon, Not a Sprint

I recently ran my first 5K. In case you were wondering, that's 3.1 miles. In case you were wondering, I ran it in 25 minutes and 35 seconds. That's a pace of ~8.2 min/mi. I didn't run a marathon, but this was a huge accomplishment for me. An accomplishment that I mentally and physically trained to achieve.

A career in the arts is a marathon, not a sprint. You start by deciding to accomplish something. My goal? Ultimately, I would like to support myself using only arts-related activities. Was this my original goal? Absolutely not. When I was sixteen, I wanted "to be an actress" but I had no conception of what that actually meant. Sure I had visions of Cosmo covers and E! interviews, but those weren't real aspirations, they were simply all I knew of the acting world. Now that I'm actually part of that world, I have a better understanding of what it means and where I'm headed.

So I started with The Warm Up: Warming up for a race is just as important as warming up for a career. I hold a BA in Theatre Arts from Brandeis. I spent a semester in London studying Shakespeare, Noel Coward, and other British greats. I participated in as much college theatre as I could. I learned about my craft in as many ways as possible.

The First Quarter Mile: After graduation, I chose a location - BOSTON. After that, it was a matter of time before I started making connections. I joined StageSource, I went on auditions, I saw theatre.

The Next Quarter Mile (AKA The First Half Mile): I got into my stride, my pace for the run - I found my niche. The fringe theatre scene. Kenny, Mary-Liz, and I started The CoLab and I started to meet more and more people who were interesting in bringing the same sort of theatre I was to the Boston area. This led to more and more auditions which led to...

Three Quarters of a Mile Down: Getting cast. During a run, the first mile and a half is the toughest to get through. My body sometimes isn't ready for it. It is the point in the run where my brain kicks in and says, "you know you can do this. Don't give up this easily." After that I get into my stride, and the roles that I've been cast in so far have helped me get into a stride in the Boston area. I've made a number of connections, friends, and I've been able to push myself as an actress. This is all part of the training, the marathon.

The Completion of the First Mile: I haven't hit this point yet in Boston. For me, it will be when I get paid for a role. (Actually paid, not just a stipend.) This had yet to happen, but I know it will some day. For now, I'll keep up my training schedule. A training schedule filled with 5k roles to help me train for marathon roles. (This is not to say that the first time I get paid will be for the role of a life time, but it will be a stepping stone.) My marathon role will be the role I've trained for my whole life. Or at least, it will feel that way. Hopefully I'll experience several marathon roles in my lifetime. But I know that won't be for some time.

And like the road, the stage is somewhere to head where things in "real life" get messy or sad or boring. My 5k training came out of a little heartbreak and little spare time. And here I am running an 8 minute mile. Like running, a career in the arts also requires your brain to train. To remember that even if you're having a tough first mile or a dry spell from getting cast, if you push just a little harder, run just a little further, it will happen for you.

So for today, I'll take my first race as a great accomplishment and I'll use this knowledge to push myself towards longer races and faster miles. And I'll do the same with the stage. With each role, I know that I'm headed toward the future. Each role builds on itself, telling me something about myself as an actress and as a human. I'm never going to run a 5 minute mile for 3 miles in a row. I'm just not. And I'm never going to be on the cover of Cosmo. But that's not what's important to me either. I don't know where I'll end up, but the journey is what's most important. Not the finish line.

A photo of my dad, brother, and I after the race!

Training The Culture

This past Tuesday, I attended the StageSource general auditions for the first time since 2008. The last time I had walked into the front theater of BPT in front of dozens of producers, I was terrified. I was nervous, repeating my monologues over and over, sweating, dry mouth...

And I suppose I did okay. I got a few offers for auditions and even a role in a reading offered in the month following. But two years later, I found myself so much more in the zone. I walked into the room at ease and confident. I wasn't perfect, I'm sure. But for one of the first times in my life I felt as if I truly owned my space and did the best I could've done. You can't ask much more than that!

What are the two major differences between now and then? Well, experience plays a part of course. But so does training. Before 2008 generals, I had just finished a good amount of training at Brandeis but hadn't had much experience. Since then, I've had time to put my training into practice.

Now, I'm not advocating you go out and start spending thousands of dollars on expensive acting classes promising to make you big Hollywood star. I feel pretty confident saying that alot of acting schools and teachers are really not that impressive and in the business of scamming off of people's dreams. But there do exists some truly wonderful teachers and training opportunities.

Training doesn't end after you get an MFA or a Master Class. It doesn't make the actor, but it certainly makes the actor better over time.

Before StageSource, I had a variety of coaching sessions. First, I met with Ben Evett of Actors' Shakespeare Project for a private coaching session he had offered via StageSource. I could go on writing about the usefulness of that session, but I'll focus on one specific gift he gave me. As I worked on Angelo from Measure for Measure, he offered me the image of small, tiny bug.

"Angelo doesn't have to show his power. He knows he's in control and he has total power over Isabella. She's like a little bug inside his fingers and he's getting pleasure out ripping her apart, limb by limb."

God. And suddenly it made so much more sense.

Next, I went to Scott Fielding of Michael Chekhov Actors Studio Boston. Same situation, I'll just focus on the gem the session.

For "Martin" from Cloud Nine by Caryl Churchill, Scott had me sit on the floor on my knees and asked me what I needed from my wife. I said "I want her to tell me how to make her happy. I need her to tell me what she wants me to do."

So in response, Scott asked me to ask her this one simple request.

"What do you want from me?"

He asked me again, with more force.

"What do you want from me?"

Not enough. He kept pressing me to keep at it.

"Please, just say what you want me to do! Tell me! What do you want?"

He wouldn't let me stop. He pushed me until I got into a frenzy, then told me to go into the monologue, and then would have me periodically go back into the question, back and forth. It was disorienting, but it completely knocked me out of my bullshit until he finallyhad me start and finish the speech. I was exhausted and really energized.

He asked me what I was doing physically. I was reaching forward. I had my hands reaching towards her, somewhat cuped and gestured in her direction.

"That's your pyschological gesture. When you do this monologue, that is the image. You should follow the gesture even when you're not making it, but everything should follow that need."

Boom. Images. You don't have to think about images. Thinking about your objectives and analyzing your scene is important, but that all goes out the door when you're onstage. It's your body and your subconcious that takes over. And that was what I have been and what I will continue to train myself for.

I don't train enough. That's part of the reason I started the CoLab, with the hope that we can all train together someday.

So I'm wondering... What kind of training have you not yet done? Or have you not done recently? Boston doesn't have enough of a culture of training. But hopefully, we can start to change that...

Best,
K